Now I know this is long overdue, it’s been a while since I have had internet access so y’all should forgive me. I think this is going to be a great year for us all. Amen!
The thing is, I don’t even know what to write about, now let me think …oh I know …MY HOUSE-HELP!
You know how it is, once you have kids, house-help or nanny issues will always come up. I have heard so many horror stories, like one whose 3 year old son was being sexually abused by her 14 year old help or another one who poured acid on her madam. Or the one who uses the water she washes her undies with to wash their sons plate or puts it in the family meal? How about my friend who found out that her husbands relative who lived with them was a pimp and prostitute?
Personally, I am tired of house-help drama, when I had my first son my mum-in-law got me someone. Nwanne claimed to be 18 but I guessed she would be 21, however she was actually 26 (my age at the time). I really didn’t care about her age as long as she behaved. She was quite good, hardworking and smart, and she was great with my son.
After 18 months, I was due to have another baby so I travelled out with my older son and enrolled Nwanne in a catering school and when I returned 3 months later I met a different person. She obviously had met people who told her she was too fine to be a help.
Anyway, as soon as I got back she told me she wanted to leave; she explained she wanted to go to school and her brother had offered to train her. I knew it was a lie, if she had a brother who could take care of her and send her to school why would she be a house-help in the first place? At that point I was ready to let her go, but because she was so diligent my husband suggested we send her to school instead.
She went to school for 6 months and then at Christmas told me she wanted to go home for 2 weeks. No problem. Only that instead of going home, she stayed in Abuja and my friend spotted her in the market the next day looking like a whore. So that was how Nwanne left.
It was tough with two little kids …my goodness that girl really spoilt me! I was a mess!
After that I got a 12 year old who I sent home the next day … I wasn’t ready to be a mother of a pre-teen. I mean, a 12 year old (who looks and behaves 9) hasn’t finished taking care of herself let alone look after your kids.
I then got a girl from the north who stayed 3 days and then decided my kids cried too much and left. At that point. I had had it! I was so frustrated.
So I just chilled and bore my cross until my aunt brought in Lois. Nice girl but lazy as hell and boy can she lie!
She’s been with me now for about a year and I am thinking of sending her away. Why? I just found out through my cousin who came on hols that:
- she’s been beating my kids; she beats (not smacks, but beats viciously) the 3 year old with slippers or her knuckles for not wearing his pants properly or some other stupid reason, and the 18 month old for pooping in his diapers.
- My neighbour told me she saw her beating my 3 year old one night
- She brings out the beast in me I have beaten her several times over lies she tells
- She watches movies all day and then tells my son to lie that they have been watching cartoon network when I get home or she will beat him.
- She lies all the time; even denied the beating the kids until she saw she couldn’t bully my cousin into retracting what she had seen.
- I buy her stuff and she complains how she gets cheap ugly stuff while all my kids stuff are nice things my relatives in the states sends (this is a girl who came with 3 clothes of which have been turned into rags and 3 sizes too small. Now she has a big ghana-must-go bag of clothes).
- She eats my kids food and tells them to come and ask me for SFC (our own KFC) so she can scrounge them, meanwhile whatever I buy for these kids, I buy for her o! I let her eat whatever she wants; in fact my aunt who brought her was amazed at how much weight she had put on.
- She is sooo lazy! always watching TV and expects so much from me. Meanwhile I send her to school and take care of her every need and more!
What do y’all think? Should I send her away or am I being petty? She has begged that she will change; maybe she will never beat the kids again (maybe) but I don’t think she can change her lazy ways. I have a house keeper who comes in and;
- bathes the kids
- cleans the house
- washes their clothes
- prepares their lunch.
- and goes to the market
so you see all the girl does is stay with the kids if we go out at night or weekends and helps in the kitchen, runs errands, and makes me shout a lot!
I need your advice, because I need peace this year!