Hello all!
Hope you’ve all had a nice weekend? Here in naija, we are still on holiday courtesy of the swearing in of our New President going on right now.
One thing that does give me a little concern are my two boys. They are really adorable and sweet, but man they can be a handful. I mean, they can frustrate even the most patient person. I left them with my husband for two hours and when I got back he was like ” Baby, I no fit do nanny work; I was with these kids for two hours and I almost went crazy!”
I don’t know why these boys don’t even fear me small! Mrs Somebody, Omara, and the other moms out there, how do you discipline young kids?
I need some fast answers because these boys don see me finish!
They climb everything climbable.
They shout at the top of their voices.
My 3 year old cries about bath-time every day… I mean, every single day -even when I bath him! He says he prefers to have a change of clothes not bath. He however is only happy when he has a bubble bath.
The 2 year old is so head strong and believes everything is his. His latest drama now is that he insists on sleeping in our room and bawls until he has his way, or then he refuses to go to bed till like midnight.
They only keep still when they are watching cartoons, and now they watch too much TV!
I mean, my 2 year old wakes up and the first words he says are “mummy I want to watch Scooby Doo”. The poor nanny is extremely patient with them and I try to spend as much time with the boys as possible so she doesn’t crack.
Suggestions anybody?
Got 2 boys – no nanny? Me and wifey decided that there is no need to kinda roll on their level. We basically gave up, and let them run the place. Just ignored them…With time they sort of came back to earth. I wouldn’t say the wahala is over, but its not as bad as it was some years ago….Boys!..Phew!
Welcome to the modern day world of parenthood. Me I cant render any advice o jare. I can only smile from the isdelines right now.
Mrs Somebody has 2 boys who are hyper active. She’ll be able to give more practical advice. Cheers
!!
i’m not married yet and dont have kids so i cant give u any kind of advice on this issue. however i just wanted to ask..?
Who do the kids take after?
if u do know who, then thats a start. if they are behaving like u, then what did your parents do to curb it.did it work? did it fail? same thing for your hubby too.
like i said, i never get pickin so i am using a layman’s point of view
E yah ndo…am not yet a mother but I can imagine how u feel. I have two sites with different articles on training children (I am preparing ahead :)).
I hope they help-
http://www.nogreaterjoy.org/index.php?id=child-training (I really like this one)
http://www.naturalchild.org/articles/living_with_children.html
Cheers
…my dear try distracting them by offering them other activites lke reading, biking (exercise for them too!).
Also try getting ur s yr old to bath himself and ofcourse in the process u’d give him a nice bath. He’ll think he’s in charge, but ofcourse we both know u are!!! Lol.
I’ve got a 16 month old son who cries every morning just to brush his teeth. Now I give him the tooth brush and when he’s through I give him a good brushng myself and it sure works. When I find out how to stop the climbing which my son also does, I’ll let u know. It’s a wonder that after the torture he’s put my laptop through I can still type this messgae.
hang in there…Cheers.
OKay, have you been watching super nanny? If yes, good if no try watching the programme on DSTV 42. Anyway, do the kids have a bedtime routine. They need this for stability. All children by the time it is 7.30pm are so exhausted they just want to sleep. I have managed through sheer will power, stress to get the children into bed at 8pm everyday. Are you able to give this a try. Now remember, they will want to sleep in your bed but the bounderies have to be set. Do you give them fizzy drinks. If yes, then make an attempt to cut this out. Makes them hyper. I swear. Otherwise, cut tv down to the mornings only and after they have had their bath. Children love routines. Anyway, will talk later. You know I lost your number give me a call when you can.
Hmm, boys can be a handful, you know. If I may suggest something it would be CONSISTENCY. Every time they disobey they get punished. Maybe a swatting on the hand or spanking their bum. Both yourself and hubby would have to be ‘on deck’ to really make that work. It has worked for my 2 older kids. That way, if they know that there will be repercussions for their ‘naughty’ actions, they will think twice.
Yes, they will protest and wail, but in a few weeks you will begin to see results. As for sleeping in bed wit you guys, that is a no-no. That young man MUST sleep in his room, even if it means lockinghis door and wearing ear plugs to ignore his crying. Again, you will reap the reward in the end.
As for cartoons – well that might be tough. I love cartoons, myself. But, what we did was pick an activity. So we take the kids out most morning for long walks or color with them or throw them in the back yard to play. It acts as a distraction, prevents a lot of tv watching and keeps them active. Oh, an playing music for them to dance helps to lessen tv watching time.
Anyway, these things work in my house. I hope some of them work for you but am sure other moms will come by and give you adequate advice.
Good luck and hang in there!
Seriously, this one beats me ooo. I no fit just…not yet!
Poor man(ur hubby), he almost ran mad
Well, i gues its a male thingy adn will get better with tym.
Do have a lovely day!
Sounds like my nephews. Same age too. Ready?
#1. You are the parent. Don’t let them run you, you run them.
#2. Whatever you do, be consistant.
#3. Set a schedule for the boys and STICK WITH IT!
IE…Morning-wash face, eat breakfast, get fully dress, watch 30 min educational program on tv. (If he wants to fuss and not comply, then he has to go to his room and lay down, if he still acting up, whip his butt).
Mid morning-have nanny to do several activities with the boys, ie cutting, drawing, painting, etc…
Have quiet time, etc…
I’m sure you get my point, however it’s very important to find out what works for your boys and sticking with it.
#4. Spanking-for me, after the 2nd 3rd warning, I get the belt or swicth, but mines are older. If they r 1-3yrs old, once you tell them 3 or 4 times, even 5, then I would smack them on the hands.
If they start hollering and acting fool, then correct them whether it’s spanking or telling them to shut that noise up. At that age, show no mercy cuz they will try you. If you don’t correct them now, when you are out in public they will embaress you like crazy. Oh yeah, since it’s dangerous to spank in the public over here, what I do is pinch or squeeze extremely hard between the neck and shoulder (there is a pressure point there), honey, trust me, they’ll stop whatever it was. But for that age, do it lighty, trust me, they’ll get the point and behave. I know it sounds cruel, but it’s not. IT’s out of love. Sure enough they will behave like they are supposed to. Oh, if the spankings don’t work, then take away their favorite whatever it is thing. Again, whatever you do, stick with it.
Eiyaaaaa………Chioma I feel you on this one.Boys will always be boys.These boys ehn???I wonder why kids these days are so fearless.For 2 and 3 yr olds,this is the age they start acting weird they’ll definately outgrow it.But
First of all you have to be really stern with them.Always Insist that they do the right thing at the right time.(bubble bath ko!lol)They are still learning and please continue to be patient even though a little spanking won’t kill them either.You can also deny them of something they really like until they agree to co-operate with you.Like no Scooby-doo until you take your bath.
I wish mine was not a weight lose blog,you for hear story tire.Every single day,I shout,I scream,I threaten….bottomline now is to let them know that they have to do the right thing as good children of God.God will grant you wisdom on how to bring them up.
GIRL, I need advise too…kids are something else I swear! All I can say is BOYS will be BOYS! I’m waiting for the responses as well.. how are you anyways?
Awww. I don’t believe I have any qualifications to give advice cos I don’t have kids yet! All I can say is “hang in there!”
lol!…what can I say, I feel for you..2boys! wow I have one and his the middle child..my first a girl ( the best child ever ) till my born-boy come..man i love the boy, but in his early days ( just thinking about ) wallpaper was ripped,what did he not distroy..we have said for his 21st birthday we will give him a bill :)…
Boys will be boys they say…what I did was just wear him out… with activity…from two, i dont like too much TV especaly any cartoon with figthing or jumping around..no power rangers in my house thank u.
PBS kids, Cbbc,cbeebies and any other educational games on the internet or buy them ( not play stations o) get them using the computer
things that would simulate them have fun and not know they are learning all at the same time ..it worked for mine…i did spend alot of time with him too that helps to calm him down..all the best! 🙂
mine is 6 now…
@ababoy-with no nanny you guys must be doing very well..keep it up.I try and let them be but it seems they get more outta control!
@an igbo dude-they take after there dad..he was one sof those kids who ran through sliding glass and has all sorts of scars…what did his mum do..nothing? they had lots of nannies, infact she is insisting I get another to help with the boys.
@2plus2- yes i do watch it and try and apply some of her rules..
@fidellini- if i let my 3yr old brush his teeth and then he doesnt let me do it for her later..
@mrs somebody,solomon sydelle,aloted,lady A, favoured girl etc..thanks for all your suggestions will try em all out.
@nyemoni..-i am well thanks ..God bless you all and thanks again
Chioma,
Sorry o. I really feel for you. I like a lot of what has been said although I am not a huge fan of spanking. I especially liked the whole get them on a routine thing -that’s the same thing super nanny advocates. It will be well. They are kids and will outgrow it with patience, love, and good parenting. Goodluck!
My dear, you have to be firm and persevere and soon you will see the results.
Like you, I ‘ve got two children and because I work full time,I find myself always making excuses to give in to my childrens’whims and it started backfiring on me!!
They hardly took me serious so I have devised some plans.
Ist, I bought a time switch for the T.V and I have set it so the T.V only comes on at certain times.Of course, my children have not decoded this yet and I pray they don’t.Also, I made a schedule for them which they follow whether or not I am home(I call from work to ensure they are following it)so when I get back,I reward them by giving them points and stickers amd at the end of the week ,depending on how good they have been,we go to MacDonald’s or go to the cinema or even go to the park. The point is I make them earn it.
I am seeing results as the ‘anu nti s'(naughty kids) of yesterday are starting to behave around me.
Mind you,my son is three and he understands most of this.
I hope I am not writing too much but I can identify with you ,when my son got introduced to sleeping alone on his bed and he didn’t like it ,we sorted it out by getting him to choose spiderman,power ranger posters for his ‘big boy bed'(he likes anything which is for big boys)he helped to decorate his wall and we read to him till he fell asleep and gave him rewards for sleeping on his bed through out the night.Make you tell him why he is getting the reward,tell his teacher how good he’s been. Try these and you will see.
gbemi’s piece..my dear thanks, i agree routine does work i have one but once in a while i deviate..I think i have to write it out..and get more organised..thanks dearie
ifie–too much? Not at all…pls bring it on! I really appreciate everything you have written,.Infact my sister just got em some spider man stickers so let me see if that will work.Thanks and God bless
The boy sleeps on the same bed with you. hmm very smart guy, he doesn’t want you people to create another competition
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madam where r u? I hope you are ok o!! The boys and the hubby nko? Take care ok?
My dear, sorry I’ve been off blogsville for a bit. I’m tearing my hair out too. Just recently, my 2/3 (he’s 3 in July) has been acting up about almost everything. The latest now is his food must have no lumps or anything he considers ‘dirty’. Fried rice is out of the question with all the veg and stuff in it. Feeding him is a nightmare. I don’t know if it is nursery or what. My sweet baby has been replaced by a mini-tyrant. I’m about to offer him up for sale. If you come up with a solution, abeg, share it.
nyemoni..I am ok thanks..we are all good..just been a bit down.plus I am on leave and i dont have internet access..Will get at home soon.. Thanks and stay blessed.
omara–good to hear from you..my dear i think with the 2/3 yr olds it a phase, cus my youngest who was such a darling has become something else..They are both settling a bit now.. God bless
Dont know the day suppernanny shows on channel 36 abi 40, u should watch it. Good luck
Chioma..UPDATE!!!
I know I have never left a comment but I am glad to know you are okay, because I have to tell you that I so relate with your blog. It’s great to have someone talk about being a twenty-thirty something, working wife and mother…come back soon, your people still dey here O!
My dear, enjoy your leave and rest well… good to know you’re ok… just holler us when you get back ok? Take care!
Is there anything the boys are particularly interested in? Although I don’t have kids myself, I have noted that many kids misbehave when they are understimulated or when they just want to have their parents attention – whether that be positive or negative attention. Is there any activity you could do with the boys that stimulates them mentally and tires them out? Works with my pets… 😀 Apart from that, being consistent is the only 100% key I know. Children need to learn consequences, and even if that consequence is negligible (like being excluded from your company for a while), the fact that they know it happens will make misbehaving much less attractive.
Misss you guys tons!
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UPDATE!!!!!
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my big sister kedi ebe ino? its been a very long while.. i hope you’re alright.. i was going to email you but i dont have your email… so please email me at overwhelmednaijababe@gmail.com.. hope you’re having a great summer.. love you lotssss
I have raised one to 7 yrs..a feat if you ask me…they will outgrow this tantrum stage but seeing finish willnot end…boys have a way of seeing their mother finish…father still has some respect though he is hardly home…mmnnhh!!! Just make sure there is a routine and stick to it…do not cave in the bath time or feeding time…you may cave in on the food choice though because you want them to eat… However, every stage brings its challenges… and more..Please continue to pray and have them confess what and who you will want them to be.
Na two boys you dey complain,come my house and see what my 3 boys are doing.I have 3 boys and 1 girl but the girl herself have turned to a boy-they argue,fight and atimes gang-up against my babygirl.That girl have seen wen but what i do now is support my daughter b4 they give her complex.No matter their age,bringing up boys is not a joke.Your small boy remind me of my last born,he is 4 but can be so bold and stubborn.He once asked his daddy why he likes locking the door anytime we are inside alone-imagine!
Reading thru ur ordeal was quite strange,seemed as if u were describing my kids, mind you, they’re two girls aged 4 and 2+, rite down to yelling the house down at bathtimes and all. I want to believe they all are like this at this age-group….and hope things will get better…there must have been a way our parents coped with us!