Two sides of me…


Even the nicest person has those days when he is just not in the mood, however I have noticed that we reserve our best behaviour for people we barely know and display our “thorns” for our dearest and best. Guest writer Alache Fisho writes about the “the two sides of me”.

There are two versions of me – the first version is the me
that is seen by the world outside, courteous, well groomed, polite and couth
(just learned recently that uncouth is not a stand-alone word!). This version
of me (let’s call her ME1) is cool, temperate, doesn’t jump to conclusions
based on half a story, waits for the other person to finish speaking before she
speaks, offers the last piece of chicken in the bowl to the gentleman sitting
across from her on the dinner table and SMILES BIG when doing all of these
things!  Then there’s the other version
of me, (ME2), she’s laid back, impatient, sometimes lazy and usually tardy! She
procrastinates, sometimes prevaricates, is grouchy, quick to judge and fast to
mete out punishment to all and sundry under her domain.

These two versions of me carry on fairly amicably as each
version knows when its on display and when its time to take a break and just
lay low. Interesting thing though is this, ME1 is usually on duty when I am
dealing with perfect strangers, work colleagues, acquaintances and generally
people with whom I have little or no personal relations. She’s amazing I tell
you, bending over backward to accommodate the failings and shortcomings of
these persons, working twice as hard to cover up for an errant co-worker,
suffering and smiling at the inconsistencies and annoying tendencies of the
lady who should have done but didnt do whatever important task that her own
activities are dependent on and making excuses for the rude assistant at the
check-out counter in the local store (she probably is just having  a bad day…).
Curiously though, ME2 the grouch and the slouch is usually
reserved for guess who ?– my dearest and closest, my beloved family. They who I
claim to hold dearest and nearest are the beneficiaries of the “Lesser Me” on a
regular basis. Where my response to being knocked over by a perfect stranger
would be a pious “not to worry, I’m sure you didn’t mean to…” to my own
flesh and blood it would be a loud and resounding “didn’t you see me coming,
step out of the way!” while I excuse poor behavior from my colleagues and
acquaintances with a shrug of my shoulders blaming it on the stress of work or
the ever handy “she’s just having a bad day”, I completely lose it when dear
husband snaps at me at the end of a hard work day.
What about getting all dolled up? ME1 is usually dressed to
the nines, make up properly done, clothes and accessories well coordinated,
smelling gorgeous and looking a million bucks. Oh dear ME2, her customary
attire is that 12 year old boubou originally made for sitting at home in, and
when I’m feeling somewhat adventurous (and probably have lost a few essential
kilos), it’s my old pair of cut-offs ( and these are real life cut-offs not the
fancy ones they sell in the stores) and a stringy old strappy top. Make-up at
home? Perish the thought! A dab of perfume? Where I dey go sef?
Sure you catch my drift by now…how come we don’t bring our
best selves home to our best folks? If there is anyone who deserves to hang out
with the best me, shouldn’t it be the people that I claim are nearest and
dearest to me? Why should my work colleagues, acquaintances and sometimes even
perfect strangers enjoy my best qualities and me in best form and I can’t be
bother most times to pay the same courtesies to my family and friends? Just
think what the home space would be like if we all treated each other as nicely
and with the same courtesy as we tend to treat other people we meet outside the
So, I suddenly realize that it’s time to invite the other
me, the nice, patient, polite and well groomed me home for dinner, and while
she’s at it she may want to stay a while longer and get to know the other
members of her family and let them get to know her too! That’s my resolve for
this season and I can’t wait to see what my people think of her! What about

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  1. Lol! this reminds me of a boy I know ..An angel is school but can be naughty at home. When I asked him why his response "I want to just be free at home but if im mischievious in school no one will like me". I guess we know our dearest love us no matter how we behave !

  2. Hmmm…..really apt! When ME1 shows up at home…the boys ask me if I’m going out…Hehehehe. ME1 needs to show up more often at home…So help me God!!!

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